[Mb-civic] Iraqi Billions missing?

[CLASSIFIED]

Re:  Iraqi Billions missing?

Harold wrote:

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Where are the monies promised to Iraq?
Where are the monies given to Iraq?

http://www.boston.com/news/nation/articles/2004/10/16/iraq_audit_cant_find_billions?mode=PF
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We're barbecuing with it in Texas, Harold.

We're skipping a scam across the pond like a flat stone.

If it skips to the other side, we win.

So far, we've won all the way almost up to Nov. 2.

We've suppressed reports.

Classified evidence so nobody can see it.

Receipts for Billions are nonexistent.

Got people like Sinclair showing our political propaganda.

The Billions...?

Don't worry, we have them, Harold.

We just greased a few wheels over there during this B movie from death 
street scam, and the rest is over here where we keep it doing good things.

If we win the Presidency again, nobody will give a flying shuck about "The 
Billions".

We will soon make them forget that....


"You're scaring us again, Uncle Classified...!!"

"Hehe....  sorry, kids..."

"So where did the Billions go...?"

"They greased some wheels over there so they could keep their operations 
going, get the 14 military bases up while guarding our new oil fields in 
the middle of a business scam distraction while some guy named bin-Laden 
was watching satellite tv and laughing his ass off, and since there were no 
records or receipts for it all then they brought the rest back to The 
States so they could put it to some use over here...  Someone later called 
it personal debt consolidation by starting wars abroad, and of course a 
pittance of it went to greasing wheels to keep the puppet government set up 
in power, a lot went to greasing wheels over here 2 weeks before the 
election..."

"And so nobody ever asked 'Where's the Bodies..?'"

"No, it was always just 'Where's the Money..?', the Bodies just kind of got 
swept to the back burner, hehe..."

"Wow..."

"Yeah, hehe...."

"Hehehehe....."

"Yeah, about 1,000 dead American soldiers, 7,000 wounded Americans, 
anywhere from 11,000 to 40,000 dead Iraqi civilians, no telling how many 
'insurgents', and they said it was just the beginning of a long long war..."

"Wow, totally nuts..."

"Yeah, it was boocoo bizarro...  Everybody was freakin', and bin-Laden was 
laughin'...."

"Scary....."

"Totally......."

"And so who won, Bush or Kerry....?"

"Kerry won..."

"Did Bush go into corporate life then...?"

"No, no, Bush was tried and sentenced in a matter of hours, and hung from a 
tree on the White House lawn by The Republican Party, just so he would keep 
his mouth shut, the same reason they never captured bin-Laden alive, they 
were both blabbermouths in captivity.  Fox News had a front row seat.  They 
described it as the greatest Presidency ever to be in America being framed 
by a jealous group of liberal parakeet breeders from Uruguay led by a 
clandestine paramilitary troop located somewhere near the North Pole where 
Santa lived still on the run..."

"And everyone believed them...?"

"Of course...."

"So then what happened, Uncle Classified...?"

"Well, heh, it was the funniest thing, they rushed Bush's body to a 
cryogenic facility, froze him solid, waited until the Supreme Court 
declared the Kerry win illegitimate, unfroze him, resuscitated him and 
fixed his neck, and that same night he was back in the White House barking 
at the moon like the lunatic he was..."

"Wow..."

"Yeah, heh, it was sad..."

"So then what did Kerry do..."

"Oh, Kerry, yeah, Bush had him shot on the floor of the Senate.  Cheney 
pulled the trigger.  Fox News quoted him as he blew him away as saying 
'Fuck me, will you, cocksucker...?  No, no, fuck you..!!'......."

"Cool....."

"Yeah, it was weird in some phantasmagoric way, Cheney became an instant 
folk hero...  People were so brainwashed and blown away and etc at that 
point, that by the time he popped Kerry, the American Media just turned him 
into a superstar overnight...  They even put him on the cover of Teen 
Magazine..."

"And so then *how* did Cheney become President...?"

"Well, after Bush unfroze and Cheney popped Kerry on the Senate Floor, 
Cheney hired one of those jungle tribesmen who uses curare tipped arrows, 
and he came into The States, stalked Bush for a day or so, got his 
autograph, then one night pulled out his blowgun, popped Bush in the side 
of the neck with the curare tipped arrow, yelled 'There can only be one of 
us...!!', Bush fell over dead, they caught the guy, threw him in jail, and 
that's where he still is today labelled as a random lunatic..."

"Wow..."

"Yeah, hehe...  And then that's how Cheney ascended to the Presidency of 
the United States of America, at last...  His greatest desire finally come 
true..."

"Wow....  And so then what happened...."

"Well, hehe, it was so strange...  He was in the White House kitchen one 
night while everyone was asleep and they found him laying on the floor 
there with the toaster on top of him, somehow there was a short in the 
toaster cord, which he grabbed and it shorted out his pacemaker, when they 
found him he was almost gone but managed to whisper 'Nixon did it...!!" 
while clutching at the person leaning over him, which everyone just put 
down to the last ravings of a lunatic..."

"Wow... hehe....  So then who became President then...?"

"Well...  That's another story...  I'm tired though, sweet dreams, night, 
kids...."

"Night, Uncle Classified...."

Click.


"Scary...."

"Yeah, I know, hehe...."

"So did they ever find all the bodies....?"

"No, no they didn't....."

"Did they ever find all the Billions....?

"No, no they didn't...."

"Oh....."

"Yeah....."

"Wow......"

"Yeah....."

"Night, Jimi..."

"Night, Judi......."